A Transformative Workshop by Graca Media

“Why don’t we have a National Commission for Men?”  

Why separate coaches for women?

“Why do women always get child custody?”  

If you’ve spent enough time on social media lately, you’ve probably come across these lines — not in academic journals or legal panels, but on reels, podcasts, and viral tweets. There’s a growing number of people, including women who claim to speak for ‘the silent suffering of men.’ They’re gaining millions of views by questioning gender laws, portraying men as victims of a biased society, and suggesting that feminism has overstayed more than required .

But here’s the thing: Is this really about justice — or is it just patriarchy rebranded?

Men suffer? Absolutely! They do go through emotional suppression, toxic masculinity, unrealistic expectations — all very real, and very harmful. But instead of fighting those things, what do we often see?  Men raging about women getting separate metro coaches. Calling it ‘discrimination.’  

“Equality means no special treatment,” they say, as if those spaces were granted on a whim — not out of necessity. Instead of questioning the systemic inequality, they get into denial to see how structural power works.

These saviours of men don’t wear the old, loud misogyny. They wear empathy. They say, “We just want balance.” They post about male depression, broken homes, unfair court rulings. 

It feels refreshing — even necessary. Until you realize that the solutions they offer often come at the cost of dismissing women’s rights.They don’t question why men are told not to cry.  They don’t challenge why masculinity is tied to dominance.  They don’t ask why men who want to be caregivers are seen as “lesser.” Instead, they direct the anger outward — toward feminism, toward women’s commissions, toward protective laws — framing them as the problem.

The internet rewards rage and reduction. ‘Men suffering’ sounds better in a reel, and hence, the outrage spreads. Young people scroll, share, and slowly start to believe that women are the enemy. Social media becomes a space where men are told they’re victims, and women are painted as abusers. Where anyone who questions this narrative is labelled “biased” or “brainwashed.”  

What we lose in these male-centric social media spaces is the bigger picture:

• The laws protecting women came after centuries of denial, violence, and silence.  
• That women still face deep structural inequality — especially those from marginalized castes, classes, and rural areas.  
• That true gender justice requires dismantling the same patriarchal systems that hurt both men and women.

But none of that goes viral, does it?

If advocacy for men involves mocking women’s protections, demanding the rollback of hard-won rights, and crying “reverse discrimination” over a separate metro coach — then maybe it’s not justice you’re after.

Maybe it’s comfort.  

Maybe it’s the old world where men didn’t have to share space — or power.

And maybe, just maybe, this isn’t the revolution we need — but the resurgence of an old hierarchy, repackaged for the algorithm.